Living Spencer Spanking Plan. Thoughts??
I was speaking to a client from Seattle yesterday and he mentioned this to me which I hadn't heard of until then.
I love the concept of handling things as they come up in order to prevent buildups of bitterness, resentment or guilt. This keeps relationships fresh and free of past residue.
I am not fully endorsing this plan, I am putting it out there to get some discussion going and to share with those unfamiliar.
Bottoms Up, Victoria
Full text below was found on: http://livingspencerspankingplan.blogspot.de/2010/07/how-was-written-by-dorothy-spencer.html
WRITTEN BY DOROTHY SPENCER IN 1936, THE SPENCER SPANKING PLAN IS A HIGHLY STRUCTURED, COOPERATIVE, DOMESTIC DISCIPLINE AGREEMENT BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIFE DESIGNED TO PROMOTE AND STRENGTHEN MARITAL HARMONY AND STABILITY. CRAFTED WITH THOUGHT, HUMANITY AND BALANCE, THIS CONTRACT MAY SERVE AS AN EXCELLENT STARTING POINT FOR THOSE CONSIDERING A SIMILAR ARRANGEMENT -- MARRIED OR OTHERWISE. IN HER OWN WORDS, "THE PLAN WAS A WONDERFUL SUCCESS."
Several years ago I conceived the idea of settling domestic misunderstandings in our home upon a somewhat unique basis--the giving and submitting to carefully regulated corporal punishment. My idea was to inaugurate a system of cooperative discipline that would sincerely benefit the party at fault and prevent all serious trouble by furnishing a definite, fair and effective method of adjustment. The plan was a wonderful success. Gratified by the happiness we attained through the operation of our somewhat novel concept, we told a few of our intimate friends of our plan and they, too, adopted the method, reporting to us the same happy results. The news began to spread, and soon, to my great astonishment, I became besieged with letters from all parts of the country asking for particulars of the "Spencer Spanking Plan," as they termed it. I shrank from the publicity that all this naturally entailed. It was one thing to tell intimate friends of our arrangement, and quite another to discuss it with strangers. With reluctance, but feeling perhaps it was my duty, in view of the many earnest appeals for help and advice I received, I answered several of the communications and agreed to send them the information desired--asking a small fee as it took up considerable time and meant not a little work to forward my ideas on the subject to them. Thus the Spencer Spanking Plan became a definite thing instead of a vague term. I found myself the originator of a System of Cooperative Discipline that bids fair to swoop the nation in a most enthusiastic way. Of course, and quite naturally, my efforts were misunderstood by many people. I found myself in contact with not a few "cranks" and nit-wits. But on the whole, I secured a splendid reception for my ideas, and I have every reason to believe that my efforts have been productive of much good. I have never claimed that the Spencer System was an infallible panacea for all the troubles of humanity nor am I of the opinion that it can or should be adopted by everyone. I do believe, however, that the idea properly operated contains genuine merit, and that most anyone CAN derive sincere benefit from it if they adopt the right attitude and live up to the rules and regulations carefully. I do not prescribe the Spencer Plan as a remedy for you to take. Only physicians are allowed to prescribe and I am not a physician. The law, however, entitles any one to market and sell their BELIEFS and OPINIONS. The principles of modern corporal punishment, as defined by the Spencer Plan, have helped me--and many other people--and it is my positive BELIEF and OPINION that if you will follow the idea out carefully and properly that it will do the same for you. Wishing you sincere success, I am, Very sincerely yours, DOROTHY SPENCER Modern Spankings Just what is a modern spanking or whipping? It is a product of today--an act of discipline given under carefully defined and controlled conditions. Brutality is entirely foreign to the idea. Revenge, oppression, force and violence are all frowned upon and do not enter into the Plan in any way. The idea of a modern spanking is to administer punishment when it is needed--then make up and forget the whole incident. In this way, every disagreement is effectively closed before it has time to ferment into serious discord--to grow into hatred or an indifference which even a great crisis may not be able to heal. The couple that has every difference out when it arises is not likely to build up an antagonism that can be settled only in the divorce courts. Also, should modern spankings and whippings be administered, they tend to improve dispositions, increase domestic happiness, create a much more desirable spirit of unselfishness, and eliminate much other unpleasantness. The operation of the Plan calls for unselfish devotion to high ideals. It calls for willing submission, and loyal obedience to a cooperative system of beneficial discipline. Starting The Plan Into Operation The couple who have attained the greatest success with Modern Corporal Punishment Doctrines are careful to insist upon a definite System being used. They do not go at the matter in a hit-or-miss fashion. The thing to do is this: Establish causes that will produce the discipline. Agree upon the matter thoroughly. Don't leave the thing to the whim of the moment. Let your wife know what she will be spanked for, so she can watch her step and strive to avoid the discipline if she can. This is only fair. Let her do the same for you. You don't want her to whip you for just any old reason--as though you were a child. You want to know in advance just what will produce the discipline. Then you can regulate your conduct accordingly. This is the only sensible way. Modern women are enthusiastically accepting the modern spanking doctrines. They approve of the idea, because it presents a definite, never-failing solution of settling many perplexing difficulties. They know in advance just what to expect. If they commit a fault they know that they will be disciplined for it. The affair will be adjusted quickly and beneficially--they will be spanked, and then promptly forgiven. The incident cannot wind up in a dangerous quarrel. Bitter words will not be said. The security of their home life -- the future of their marriage -- will NOT be endangered. A modern spanking is not a dreadful thing to endure. It hurts a little, of course. It has to hurt to be effective. But there is no danger to it. The temporary hurt is beneficial--it gives them just the lesson they need--and when it is over, THE TROUBLE IS OVER. Few women, after becoming used to being spanked--the modern way--would discard the idea and go back to the old way of quarreling for anything in the world! This has been proven time after time and again. Modern Whippings Here we have the most unique, but valuable feature of modern discipline. Women are spanked and men are whipped. The husband spanks his wife, and the wife whips her husband. It is cooperative--not one-sided. It is the fairest system of discipline ever conceived, and it is conducted under definite RULES and REGULATIONS that safe-guard the practice from every angle. These Rules and Regulations MUST BE OBSERVED TO THE LETTER--for they safeguard the whole. I present them without further delay: Rules and Regulations Covering the Administering of Spencer Discipline: 1.--Women are to be spanked, never whipped. Any dictionary will explain the difference. Mine explains as follows: "Whip--to strike with a whip, flog beat, lash. Spank--to slap forcibly on the buttocks." Under Spencer Rules a girl or woman can be spanked with the palm of the hand only. No other spanking agency can be used--not even a light strap or ruler. 2.--Care must be taken not to bruise the flesh, raise welts or injure the body in any way. The punishment should continue long enough, however, to be truly effective and to impart a beneficial lesson. 3.--A spanking must never be administered in anger. Wait until both parties are calm and it can be carried out properly. 4.--The spanking over, the incident must close. To hold anything against a punished partner, after a spanking or whipping has been given, is in direct violation of this whole method of correction. 5.--A spanking or whipping must never be given before a third party under any circumstances, nor is any one to be informed that such discipline is employed without the FREE CONSENT and WILLING Permission of both parties. 6.-Requested punishment MUST be given. Here we have a most important and valuable feature of the Spencer Plan. It is not enough to take the discipline without fuss or argument when our punishing partner feels we should have it--we must also ASK FOR IT, when we know or feel that we deserve it! 7.--Men are to be whipped. A light leather strap, a wooden paddle or ruler can be employed to administer the punishment with. Wives must use extreme care, however, not to cut the flesh, raise welts or injure the recipients in any way. 8.--Not more than two spanking or two whippings can be administered in any one day. It is seldom necessary to observe this precaution--but it is put in to cover very unusual and unexpected circumstances. In the extremely rare instances where a wife really merits more than two spankings in any one day, the punishment must be postponed to the next day or to whatever day her husband deems best. The same holds true for the husband who needs such extreme discipline. 9.---The punishment should be inflicted upon the bare skin. In no other way can a careful check be kept on the progress of the spanking or whipping. Remember, the idea of modern corporal punishment is to sting the flesh effectively, without cutting or harming it in any way. To do the job intelligently, therefore, a constant scrutiny of the skin MUST be maintained. A spanking or whipping administered over clothing--even a thin, single garment is "blind punishment." It may be altogether too severe, or not severe enough. 10.--Spencer doctrines call for the PROMPT ACCEPTANCE of the discipline. There must be no argument--no protest--no pleading to be let off--no hard feelings about it! A Word of Warning! When a man begins spanking his wife--under the Spencer Plan--he is apt to over do the thing just at first. The same thing goes for women when they first begin the practice of whipping their husbands. The very novelty of the thing--their new sense of power--often causes them to be too zealous in the application of their rights. This should be carefully guarded against. No woman wants to be spanked more often than it is necessary for her own good--and no man wants to be whipped indiscriminately. Too frequent application of the new doctrines destroys their effectiveness. Remember this carefully. On the other hand--after a definite list of CAUSES has been established--don't be lax in administering the discipline! Understand what I mean? First of all--get together and talk things over THOROUGHLY. Have an understanding. Know JUST what you are doing. Agree upon it. Don't leave anything to chance--to the whim of the moment. Suppose for example, the husband is a fast automobile driver. He likes speed--likes to drive the family car too fast for safety. His wife recognizes the danger, and one of her "Causes" is "Fast Driving." She informs him that she is going to write onto her list that he must not drive over forty miles an hour and if he does, she will whip him for it! Many women are doing this very thing since the various Safety Campaigns have been inaugurated AND I THINK IT IS A MIGHTY FINE AND SENSIBLE THING TO DO! All right, she has delivered her ultimatum. If he drives over forty miles an hour, she will whip him. And she should, every time. That is what I mean about not being lax. When a cause has been violated--when either party NEEDS the discipline--see to it that they get it. Don't be lenient or lax--for their sake! It is the only way you can truly help them. Let each make out a written list of the faults they wish could be eradicated in the other. Talk the thing over sensibly. Then sign written Agreements, such as I give you a little later in this Course--and live up to them to the letter. It calls for real SPORTSMANSHIP--real, honest-to-goodness COOPERATION--and any man or woman should be proud to have a marriage partner, big hearted enough, and big souled enough, to display it! How A Modern Spanking Should Be Given A question many people ask, when first taking up modern discipline, is: "How long should a spanking last? About how many slaps should be given?" There can be no definite answer to such a question. I do not recommend any certain stated number of slaps. The idea is always to continue the spanking until you believe it has been effective-without at any time resorting to unnecessary harshness or uncalled for severity. It has been found that comparatively mild slapping, applied to the buttocks, can be made to sting effectively, without doing one particle of damage or leaving any evidence of unpleasant, harsh treatment. The object is to sting the flesh--make the whole spanking surface hot and tender--so that the repeated application of the descending hand is severe enough to make the recipient realize she is really being disciplined. By spanking the buttocks long enough, first in one spot and then another, the woman experiences enough stinging discomfort to get a real lesson out of the experience. Her flesh is not harmed--it just becomes pink and sore enough to make her realize she will be very glad when it is over. As most women cry very easily, if the spanking is prolonged just a few minutes--even in this careful and really mild manner-- a few beneficial tears are often shed before the discipline ends. Here is the program most couples follow: When a spanking is to be given, the wife is directed to go to her room and get ready. This means she is to undress and wait up in her room until her husband comes up to discipline her. When her husband enters the room there should be no delay in carrying out the discipline. She must not argue about the matter--beg to be let off--or show any sign of resentment. She must obey without a word. It is best not to say a single word during this period. The wife should quietly place herself across her husband's lap--after he seats himself on the edge of the bed. Holding her in place, in the age-old spanking position, he begins spanking her. His duty is to do a thorough job-- taking the utmost pains to do it right. The spanking over--and still without speaking--the husband should let his wife up, then quietly leave the room. It's the wife's duty--after dressing and drying her tears (if the spanking has provoked any) to go to her husband then, thank him for administering the discipline--and kiss him. If this seems hard to do, you have lost the true spirit of the Plan and you must MAKE YOURSELF DO IT in order to win it back! Friendly relations should then be immediately re-established. Is Such Discipline Really Helpful? There can be no question of it. While women know that Spencer Spankings are SAFE SPANKINGS--they are still spankings. And any spanking hurts enough to convey a good-lesson. It causes the lady to think twice before repeating the offense she is punished for! It is an experience that makes an impression something that is remembered beneficially. Women are for it because it gives a QUICK ADJUSTMENT of the difficulty--without a tiresome lecture or scolding. Few women, after becoming used to spankings, would discard the idea for anything in the world, but they will all tell you that the discipline is effective, and something certainly to be avoided if you can! That is why it is effective. How a Modern Whipping Should be Given If the husband is to be whipped, he is directed to go to his room and get ready for the punishment He must obey, without a word of complaint or without uttering a word of argument. He should undress--then stretch out full length on the bed, face-downwards. He must wait in this position, until his wife enters the room--whether she comes in immediately or keeps him waiting several minutes--as some women do. As soon as she enters the room, and without speaking, she begins whipping him. Her job is to whip him efficiently--effectively-but humanely. She must observe all the rules carefully--but she can, at the same time, make the session quite effective and truly beneficial. Some women use a wooden paddle only. Others employ a strap. The great majority use both. The paddle first-- to warm up the skin good--then the intelligent application of a leather strap. A man's belt is often used. Many wives require that this be placed ready for use when the man takes his whipping position. A modern whipping does a man good for several reasons First of all, there is the beneficial humiliation it causes. It is an act of complete submission. Just to stretch out obediently and get ready for the punishment does him good. Before the paddle is applied a single time--before a single stroke of the strap is delivered--the discipline starts being effective and beneficial for this very reason! It is an act of surrender--and being a willing gesture of submission--it does more good than millions of spoken words would possibly do! Don't think for a moment that modern women are not learning how to make their whippings effective, too! Just because they are using common sense rules that safe-guard the practice from assuming any aspect of brutality--don't think for a single moment that they are administering "play whippings" or that they can't make the discipline something to be sincerely dreaded! If the idea seems silly to you--if you feel it is a foolish notion to believe that any woman could whip a man effectively-especially under the rules and regulations -laid down by this Course--you are in for a distinct surprise! You do YOUR PART, and you can depend on it, SHE WILL LEARN TO DO HERS. The Spencer Spanking Agreements I. For Married Women Date ______________________ 19___ I, . ____________________________ wife of _________________________. do hereby acknowledge that I have read the Spencer Spanking Plan and approve of the doctrines it advocates. From this date on it is my wish to have my conduct regulated by the enforcement of these doctrines. I give to my husband, therefore, the full right and permission to spank me whenever he feels such discipline would prove helpful and be in accordance with the spirit of the Spencer Plan. This Agreement has been entered into willingly--and for no other purpose than to improve my disposition and secure the general benefit that always comes from the enforcement of intelligent discipline. I understand that I will be spanked without fail if I break my promise to refrain from: (List Causes which have been agreed upon.) I promise to cooperate with my husband faithfully. I will get ready for the punishment promptly when asked to do so and I will bear him absolutely no ill-will for so disciplining me. I promise further to ASK for spankings when I feel I need them. I realize that Request Punishment plays a highly important part in the Spencer Plan, and I will report and ask for the discipline when I feel need or deserve it. (Signed) X _________________________________ (wife) X _________________________________ (husband) II. For Her Husband I, _________________________husband of ____________________________: in accordance with her wishes, as expressed above, do hereby promise and agree to spank my wife when-ever I feel such discipline would prove helpful to her. I have read the Spencer Plan carefully, and subscribe to the RULES AND REGULATIONS. I especially agree as follows: 1st--To spank her only with the open palm of my hand. 2nd--To take care not to cut her skin, raise welts or otherwise bruise or injure her body. 3rd--To slap her only upon her buttocks, after she has placed herself across my lap in the regular spanking position. 4th--To resume friendly relations immediately after a spanking is over. To hold a grudge or to continue a quarrel or misunderstanding after a spanking has been administered is in direct violation of the whole spirit of the Spencer Plan. For my wife's own good, I promise to discipline her without fail whenever any of the causes listed above have been violated. (Signed) X _________________________________ (wife) X _________________________________ (husband) III. For Married Men Date ___________________ 19_____ I, _________________________husband of ____________________________: do hereby acknowledge that I have read the SPENCER SPANKING PLAN, and approve of the doctrines it advocates. From this date on it is my wish to have my conduct regulated by the enforcement of these doctrines. I give my wife, therefore, the full right to whip me whenever she feels such discipline would prove helpful and be in accordance with the spirit of the Spencer Plan. I promise to cooperate with my wife faithfully in carrying out this agreement. I will get ready for the punishment promptly when asked to do so and I will bear my wife no ill-will for so disciplining me. I understand that I will be whipped without fail if I break my promise to refrain from: (List Causes which have been agreed upon) I also promise to ask for whippings when I feel I need or deserve them I realize that Request Punishment plays a highly important part in the Spencer Plan, and I will report and ask-for the discipline when I feel I deserve it. (Signed) X _________________________________ (husband) X _________________________________ (wife) IV. For His Wife I, _________________________wife of _______________________________: in accordance with his wishes, as expressed above, do hereby promise and agree to whip my husband whenever I feel such discipline would prove helpful to him. I have read the Spencer Plan carefully and subscribe to the RULES AND REGULATIONS. I especially agree as follows: 1st--To whip him only with the following objects--a leather strap, a stout ruler or a flat wooden paddle. 2nd--To whip him only upon his buttocks, after he has stretched out at full length upon his stomach on bed or couch. 3rd--To take care not to cut his skin, raise welts or otherwise bruise or injure his body. 4th--To resume friendly relations immediately after the whipping is over. To hold a grudge or to continue a quarrel or misunderstanding after a whipping has been administered is in direct violation of the whole spirit of the Spencer Plan. For my husband's own good, I promise to discipline him without fail whenever any of the causes listed above have been violated. (Signed) X _________________________________ (husband) X _________________________________ (wife) A Word To Married Men Many men send for my Plan. This is not to be wondered at. The average man is naturally just as anxious and eager to make his marriage a success as his wife can possibly be. I send my warmest congratulations to any man who is broad-minded enough to put the Spencer System into effect in his home! I think he is making a gallant gesture--that he has displayed true chivalry toward his marriage partner! Why? Because the Spencer Plan is the fairest thing for women ever conceived! It makes them the absolute EQUAL of their husbands--as all true men desire them to be! Remember, when you sign a Spanking; Agreement with your wife-TWO Things Happen. You gain the right to spank her--she gains the right to whip you. It is NOT a one-sided affair! American women are too independent in spirit to approve of any System that does not give them equality. And right here, Mr. Husband, let me suggest something. If you sent for this Plan and are eager to put it into operation, why not start it going by taking a whipping right away? Nothing else you can do will more thoroughly prove to your wife that your intentions are the best-- that you mean to do your part every step of the way. I suggest that you have a heart-to-heart talk. Read the Plan together. Explain that she doesn't need spankings a bit more than you need whippings. Tell her you are sorry for many little things you have said or done since you were married, and that you wish she would discipline you for it--here and now. Tell her she is the ONLY PERSON IN ALL THE WORLD you would grant such a privilege to (which undoubtedly is true). Then ask her to sign Spencer Agreements with you. You list her faults, she lists yours. Agree upon them--then sign the compacts. Then ask her to give you a whipping. Tell her you want to be the first to receive the new discipline. She may argue that you should wait until one of the causes listed has been violated, etc. Be firm, however, and tell her you will really feel much better if she will give you a whipping right away. As your Agreements specify that REQUESTED PUNISHMENT MUST BE GIVEN, she is obliged to comply with your request. And you will find that this Courtesy of extending to her the first right of discipline will be appreciated, and will do more to gaining her approval and consent to the whole idea than anything else could can possibly. A Word To Wives Modern living has evolved many innovations into use--and to a large extent, revolutionized time worn opinions and habits. It is impossible to stay the hand of progress. If we were to cling to the set formulas of yesterday and refuse to open our minds new viewpoints--viewpoints that are the natural result of our ever changing civilization--moral stagnation would be the inevitable result. We would become a decadent people and a stupid people. One of the issues facing modern women in no uncertain manner is CORPORAL PUNISHMENT. An age-old discipline in a new and completely modern dress. A modem spanking is as much of an improvement over yesterday's flogging, as the airship is over the ox-team, or the radio over the old styled phonograph! To be spanked today is as acceptable in our social code as to be congratulated! It carries no stigma of disgrace or even novelty. It is being done- it has the stamp of modern approval--it is the correct thing. ]If your husband, therefore, wishes to adopt SPENCER DOCTRINES--congratulate yourself. It means that from now on, you are his absolute EQUAL--and that all danger of an unhappy marriage is removed! Don't dread modern spankings, please! They will hurt a little, of course--they have to, to do you any good. But Spencer Rules and Regulations protect you from the slightest harm or danger. Read them and you will see this. Your husband cannot whip you. And the only thing he can spank you with is the palm of his open hand. In return, YOU gain the right to whip him. Of course, you, too, must observe all Spencer Rules. Brutality has no part in the plan on either side, under any consideration. But you do gain the right to discipline him You can whip him--he can spank you. You will be surprised at how much good you will derive from Spencer spankings, and you will be equally surprised to see how much good your husband will derive from your whippings. Give the method a six months trial--living up to it faithfully, and you will never wish to go back to the old way, I am sure.